From Ill-fitting Blazers to Pink Pumps: What It’s Like to Be a Woman In STEM

I didn’t realize I was different until college CS classes when the ratios got stark. I’d be one of two or three girls in a sea of men, learning how to code in C++. 

But it didn’t start that way. It started with supportive parents who nudged me towards my strengths. They signed me up for chorus when I wouldn’t stop singing in the shower and pointed me towards a Math degree when I walked into college with NO IDEA of what I wanted to do with my life. Math came naturally to me, so I dove in while I figured the rest out.

Since then, the patterns have followed: the lone woman in a math classroom became the lone statistician in a meeting room full of software developers, and over time, that lone woman soon earned a seat at the boardroom table. Once, at a women’s leadership conference, I was asked how I did it, how I became a leader. 

I wish I had some big, inspiring answer, but I didn’t always know. It wasn’t just me getting myself here, either. It took years of hard work and a lot of support from others–men and women both. Mostly, I just found the courage to keep showing up, stepping into rooms that weren’t exactly “inviting” and speaking up, even if my voice shook a little in that ill-fitting blazer. 

Finding my voice didn’t happen overnight. Without a mentor who looked like me, it took longer to move from mimicry to authenticity, to learn to bring my own strengths to the table. It’s a journey of figuring out how to be yourself in spaces where you’re different, forcing you on the fast track to find your own voice (which continues to evolve, by the way).

Being a woman in STEM has been as much about self-discovery as it has been about resilience. I didn’t have a clear blueprint to follow, but over time, I’ve found my own path, and I hope that each step I take makes it a little easier for the next woman who steps into these rooms. We’re all here not just to succeed but to make sure those who follow us won’t have to wonder if they belong. We’re here to change what “normal” looks like in these spaces—and that, more than anything, keeps me showing up every day.